Jealousy

Freida took the volleyball net down last night, I heard because she was afraid someone would either cut the wires or steal it. Stealing it could come from anyone, but cutting the wires would have most likely been from her son or son's "friends". I've heard about stuff like this. Christians in Africa who finally start getting ahead and the family burning down their new business. I always thought this was baffling and quite insane. I mean how will hurting someone else make anything better? And yet this is common practice.

I read a blog post by a dear lady recounting a pretty horrific day she had had, part of which included feeling totally little for only bringing some small store bought items for a class party (and those almost forgotten) while other moms brought very extravagant cakes (see pictures). She looked at those other mom's creations and immediately put them in a "super mom" category while she herself felt inferior.

This is such a common ailment among moms/wives and I only just saw it through her post. The reason I saw it is that I could see myself making a 3D cake for my kid's party- not that it would look good, but to me something like that would be fun.

But instead of being awed by the creation or excited that her daughter would have such a fun party, or happy for the other mom being able to contribute something so creative and elaborate- she felt belittled. Why?

I'm thinking these cakes were made by stay at home moms. Just a guess. In that case, they often have little to no (visible) reward for mothering. Meanwhile, working moms are affirmed often through what they do from (possibly) the boss, co-workers, the feeling of having "accomplished" something, a paycheck! But instead of rejoicing for the other in their accomplishments, we often mentally pit ourselves against each other.

Comparing ourselves to each other is folly and an easy way to self-destruct. How beautiful it would be to say, "hey, I suck at cakes, but that one is awesome- I'm so glad you were able to bring that". I know I'm good at buying styrofoam cups, so I'll do that and be happy about what I can contribute, no matter how it may look. And just be happy- happy for others and for ourselves in all that we can do.