breaking the news

I got to go see Princess. It was a sad/glad thing. I've been meaning to go see her for a while, but when her friend was killed, I knew I needed to take her parents so they could give her the news. In a way I'm glad she is where she is when she heard because she will have lots of people she can talk to and sort out her feelings. She was likely to go ballistic if she was out and this occurred. I'm hoping she will finally open up and maybe we can start talking about the deep things. I think it helps that we are both going through grief (I lost my first nephew in Nov.) We have some common ground in this although the circumstances were vastly different.

She was only allowed 2 visitors at a time, so her mom and step dad went first and gave her the news. I'm glad she hadn't seen it on the TV or in the paper first and that she got to hear it from loved ones. Then I swapped places with her step dad. She made a bunch of lame excuses why she hadn't written and promised to write- we'll see. The important thing is that we were able to be there and tell her and that I know my love for her and letters do make her face light up. She was recounting everything I wrote with smiles and saying how it brought her joy and laughter.

I got to know Princess' mom and step dad a lot better on the drive as they recounted their memories of the victim (which they were like parents to). Stepdad gave a couple of sermonettes on the way there and back. His first one was about giving and helping others out even if they don't appreciate it. One of their fondest memories was taking their and the victim's family to six flags and having a total blast and taking them shopping. They came into some money and totally spent it on the two households. Most middle class people would call that foolish. If you have a few grand- get ahead (pay off debt, buy a home, get a much needed car). The poor have a different philosophy- throw a party, help others, splurge and do things we've never had a chance to do- it's about being together, making memories, showing love.

There's a parable about investing in the eternal. That trip to six flags was pouring love into the kids and another household as they knew best. It was putting the needs of others above their own. It was living like today was all that mattered. It was Jesus type extravagance.

The second sermon he gave was about right living and how the Lord will come when we least expect it. I find it totally ironic when people give sermonettes about things they are not living. I think this gets real strong when the "church" person is in the vicinity (haven't gone in years and will always be seen as the church person- sometimes that is good, mostly I think it's bad. People won't be real and become religious for the church person, but sometimes when they really want to deal with spiritual things, they'll come to us first).

Apparently Princess is doing good there in her school work. She's started the GED process and is now in 9th grade work, which is amazing since she was only in 7th last summer.